Love Is Watching Someone Die
by crabbySeer
Summary: After an argument, Natalie storms out of the house and meets an unfortunate accident, leading Lucifer to bargain with God on her behalf and say some tough goodbyes.


"I can't believe you!"

Natalie was fiercer than Satan had ever seen her before. Red seeped into her nose and cheeks and finger tips, and if he thought it were possible for mortals, he might have seen it in her eyes too. "Girl, I—"

"No!" In her hands she held the broken remnants of a picture frame, the mangled remains of the photo dangling from the glass. Tears slid down her cheeks and onto the memory of her mother. He wasn't sure whether she was more angry or sad. "You started this thing with Michael and of all the things you could have used to hit him with, it was the one picture I have of us together! And as though that wasn't bad enough, you tell me it's just a photo of my dead mom? That her picture doesn't make her any less dead?"

"Nat, listen—"

She cut him off again. "You've done a lot of awful things to me Lucifer, but this… This is a low blow. Saying you didn't mean to or that it was an accident doesn't make it better!" She tried to say more, but the lump in her throat choked her and all that came out was a gurgling noise. Eventually she gave up talking and instead turned on her heel and stormed out, slamming the door behind her.

Satan let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding. It was another behaviour of her's that had been rubbed off on him—Breathing. There was no reason for him to do so, but he did anyways. Sometimes he caught himself doing other human things too—scratching itches that didn't exist, napping on the couch, yawning. Plainly, he had been spending too much time in the mortal world if he was starting to mimic them.

He didn't move for a long time, instead he stared at the door waiting for her to return. She needed to know that what he did, what he said, he didn't mean for it to hurt her. How was he to know? He'd never cared for anyone before. Death was meaningless to him.

An hour passed, and then two. He could feel the cold of the rain falling on her skin and the sore in her feet from walking. He couldn't understand her, why she would stay out in the rain instead of coming back home and relaxing, going back to fun and games and screwing each other over. If nothing else, he didn't know why she didn't just end the contract if she was so furious with him. It'd gone on long enough that they felt each other's pain even, and considering how much he was made to suffer by the hands of his brother, he would've pegged her for giving up long ago. Instead, she complained about the pain but held on for dear life.

He felt the biting wind on his cheek and the brief sting of a tweaked ankle. 'Now she will come home' he thought briefly, his mind on the sting and the dim following pain in his knee. A smirk just started to grace his features before he felt it.

The feeling of having his wind knocked straight out of him.

His eyes widened into bright gold orbs as the rest of the pain started to seep in—bright beacons of burning in his legs, his spine, his head, his shoulders. A tearing sensation in his calves and collarbones, the feeling of blood dripping into his eyes.

Without another moment of hesitation he was out the door, wings ripped from his back in a burning blaze of pain and fire. They lifted him gracelessly into the sky where he searched for her, any part of her, wherever she could be. It didn't take long to figure it out—he followed the ambulances and the scent of fresh blood and burning oil.

By the time he made it to where she was and changed into his other form, Natalie had been lifted onto a stretcher and was being pushed towards the waiting ambulance. He tried to run to her, but a dutiful man in a uniform put out his hand to keep him away.

"No! You have to let me see her! I need to see her right away!"

"Sorry, son. She needs to be taken to the hospital. She's lost a lot of blood, and if we don't get her there soon, she's going to die."

Stan stared at the man in abject horror, his face full of disbelief. He opened his mouth to speak, but just as he started to talk the pain in his body began to dissipate, leaving nothing behind. His head snapped to look at her, her eyes drooping and barely alive, but staring straight at him. Blood pooled in the bottom of her oxygen mask and streaked her hair. The nurses finished loading her into the ambulance and quickly drove off, towards the hospital.

"Do you need a ride to the hospital son?" The officer that held him back before put a gentle hand on his shoulder, snapping out of the trance like feeling he was in.

"No… What happened…?" He didn't need to ask, the evidence was before him. A car splattered with her blood, a crying man swearing he didn't see her, she just tripped right in front of him, broken glass. It was obvious.

The officer seemed to know that too, but he answered anyways. "The man there says he was driving along and she stumbled out in front of his car. He tried to stop but it was too late. Do you know her?"

"She's my… My sister." His shoulder's slumped in defeat; he already knew that there was nothing they could do. "I'll call our dad and let him know what happened."

The officer nodded and turned away, back to his duty and the blood being washed away on the pavement. Satan stumbled away into the nearby trees and when he was certain no one was watching, he disappeared.

"Move, Michael. I need to see Father."

Michael walked backwards in front of Lucifer, his eyes a false mask of sympathy. "There's nothing he can do, brother. You know that."

"Get out of my way."

"You know the rules! She's as good as dead and—" He was cut off by Satan's fist slamming through his teeth.

Lucifer latched his fingers into Michael's jaw and curled the fingers of his other hand into his brother's hair. "Listen to me you boot licking piece of fucking shit. I know she's dying. I know we can't bring her back. But if you think I'm going to give up because of that, you're dumber than I thought. This happened because of us brother dear, and I am not going to let go without at least trying." With that, he ripped Michael's jaw out and a significant handful of hair and tossed him unceremoniously to the side.

He knocked once before entering God's chambers. "Father."

"You killed Michael again."

"Of course I did. You knew I would."

"Yes. And I know why you're here." The man at the table looked up, eyes filled with benevolent love and the knowledge of all. "She broke contract, and now she's dying."

"She was going to die anyways. We both know that."

God smiled upon him. "She didn't do it because she thought it might get her out of her end of the contract."

Lucifer frowned. "What do you mean?"

"We are not the only ones who know she is dying, Lucifer. She knows it too, and she knows that if she can feel your pain that you can feel her's. She let you out of the contract so you wouldn't feel her die." God's smile softened. "Remarkably selfless on her part. She didn't want you to hurt."

For the first time in his life, Lucifer's heart fell, alerting him to it's existence.

"You know, of course, that there's nothing that I can do. She's too far gone, beyond even miracles now."

"I know."

"Then why are you here?" God's voice was soft and warm.

"Father, I want you to release her from her end of the contract."

God quirked an eyebrow. "This isn't like Job, is it. Not a deal, but a legitimate request."

"You put me in charge of Hell and we agreed that no one would know that we were both in on it. You told me it was necessary to judge the souls who were good enough to come to Heaven, that it was also necessary that the other angels not know so there wasn't a real uprising. I've done what you asked, and I've done it faithfully for years. I'm telling you now that she… She's not worthy of Hell. She didn't even make the contract, it was thrust upon her."

"I know, Luce. I know." God looked at His desk, His fingers laced in pensive thought.

"Please, Father. This one thing I ask, and I haven't asked for a favour in thousands of years. Ignore the technicality of the contract since she didn't make it. Let her go to Heaven. Let her see her mother again. Don't abandon her in Hell. Don't leave her to rot with the murderers and rapists."

God stared at His son for a long time, judging Lucifer's conviction. "Fine. I will bring her to Me."

Again, Lucifer let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding, and God smiled softly. "She will miss you."

"No she won't, I killed her."

"You didn't help. But she will miss you regardless. And you'll miss her."

Lucifer stared at the ground. "Call it a punishment for torturing Michael and my hand in her death. I will hold her memory close to remind myself of mortality, but I will never mourn her disappearance from my life. I would only make her eternity so much worse, and she's better off without me." He looked up and briefly made eye contact with his father before turning to leave. "Thank you." With that, he walked out the door and through the door of the hospital.

After a few more little lies, he was let into Natalie's room. Her face was covered in cuts and bruises, and her pulse was weak. A nurse fussed around her, checking vitals and patching the last of the wounds. He took a seat in the corner, watching as the nurse finished her work.

"She won't be able to hear you, but you can stay. We've put her in a coma for her comfort." With that, she left.

Lucifer quickly drug his chair closer to her and took her hand in his. Her fingers idly curled around his, but her eyes didn't open and she showed no signs of waking. He spoke to her anyway.

"Hey Nat. You're… You're dying. You don't have much time left, and neither do I. Once you're gone, there's no reason for me to stay here and I'll be going back home.

"We had some good times, you and I. It's… Unfortunate that it had to end like this, but it was bound to happen either way. I was expecting you to die, but what I wasn't expecting was that you wouldn't let me experience it.

"I also didn't expect to feel for you as much as I do." He paused, looking at her face and remembering all the times they had together. "I am not supposed to become attached to humans, that's why I have my job. Father chose me because he know that I could judge the souls of the dead impartially, and punish those that deserved it. Because of you though, I've gained a piece of heart that I never thought I would, and you're to blame.

"I'll keep it with me always. Call it selfishness, but I can't bear to give you up completely." He brushed a hand across her cheek as gently as possible. "You're gonna love Heaven Nat, but don't get too soft on me. Give 'em Hell, kid." He leaned in and kissed her softly, a brush of lips. He squeezed her fingers, but the fell away, her heart monitor letting out a long uninterrupted tone.

"See you later, little Gnat. Tell your mom I said Hi, and that she did a great job with you."


End file.
